When to Use a Coach (And What Kind)

"Coaching is a $15 billion industry. Some of it is transformative. Some of it is expensive hand-holding. Here's how to know when you need one—and how to choose well."

The Case for Coaching

At senior levels, the decisions get harder, the feedback gets thinner, and the stakes get higher. Most executives are surrounded by people who can't or won't tell them the truth—or who don't have the perspective to help.

• Has no agenda except your success
• Can see patterns you can't see from the inside
• Asks questions you're avoiding
• Holds you accountable to what you say you want
• Has seen similar situations before

Coaching isn't therapy. It's not mentorship. It's not consulting. It's a structured relationship focused on helping you think and act more effectively.

When Coaching Makes Sense

Signal 1: You're Facing a High-Stakes Decision

Big career decisions—stay or go, take the new role, navigate a conflict, negotiate an exit—benefit from outside perspective. The cost of deciding poorly is much higher than the cost of coaching.

Signal 2: You're Not Getting Honest Feedback

At senior levels, people stop telling you the truth. Your team is afraid of you. Your peers have their own agendas. Your manager is too busy. A coach fills this gap.

Signal 3: You're Repeating a Pattern

If the same problems keep showing up—difficult relationships, burnout cycles, career stalls—you might need someone to help you see what you're doing to create them.

Signal 4: You're Stepping Into a Bigger Role

Transitions are risky. First-time executives, new leaders, people taking on significantly expanded scope—all benefit from support through the adjustment period.

Signal 5: You're Stuck

You know something needs to change but you can't see what. You're spinning on the same questions. You've lost clarity on what you want. Coaching breaks the loop.

When Coaching Doesn't Make Sense

You Need Information, Not Perspective

If you need to learn a skill (how to run a board meeting, how to build a financial model), you need training or consulting, not coaching. Coaches ask questions; they don't teach content.

You Need Therapy

If you're dealing with deep-seated anxiety, trauma, depression, or relationship patterns that go back decades—that's therapy territory. A good coach will recognize this and refer you.

You're Not Ready to Change

Coaching requires you to do the work. If you want someone to tell you you're right, or you're not willing to try new things, coaching will be frustrating for everyone.

The Problem Is Structural

If you're in a toxic environment, have a terrible manager, or are in the wrong role—coaching might help you see that, but the answer is usually to change the situation, not to work on yourself.

Types of Coaches

Not all coaches are the same. Here's a rough taxonomy:

Executive Coach

Best for: VPs, C-level, and aspiring senior leaders Typical engagement: 6-12 months, ongoing

Career Coach

Best for: People changing roles, industries, or going through job search Typical engagement: 3-6 months, project-based

Leadership Coach

Best for: First-time managers, new leaders stepping up Typical engagement: 6-12 months

Performance Coach

Best for: Addressing a particular gap or development area Typical engagement: 3-6 months, goal-focused

Life Coach

Best for: When the question is bigger than career Typical engagement: Varies widely

Decision Coach

Best for: Acute situations requiring clarity and action Typical engagement: Single session to 4-8 weeks

How to Choose a Coach

1. Clarify What You Need

• What's the situation you're navigating?
• What would success look like?
• What kind of support do you need?

A coach should fit your needs. Don't hire an executive coach if you need help with job search. Don't hire a career coach if you need ongoing leadership development.

2. Check Their Background

• Experience with people in similar roles or situations
• Relevant credentials (ICF certification is common but not essential)
• A professional approach to confidentiality and ethics
• References or testimonials from people you trust

• Coaches who make big promises or guarantees
• Anyone who seems more focused on their brand than your needs
• People without clear explanations of their approach

3. Do a Chemistry Call

• Do they listen more than they talk?
• Do they ask good questions?
• Do you feel challenged but not judged?
• Do they understand your situation?
• Can you imagine being honest with this person?

The relationship matters more than the methodology.

4. Be Clear on Structure and Expectations

• How often will you meet?
• What's the communication between sessions?
• What's the duration of the engagement?
• What's the cost?
• How will you measure progress?

5. Evaluate Early

• Are you getting value?
• Are you being challenged?
• Are you making progress?

If it's not working, it's okay to end the engagement. A good coach won't take it personally.

What to Expect

From the Coach:

• Questions that make you think differently
• A confidential space to process
• Accountability for what you commit to
• Honest feedback (if you want it)
• Structure and consistency

From Yourself:

• Honesty about what's really going on
• Willingness to try new approaches
• Doing the work between sessions
• Being open to challenge

What Coaching Is Not:

• Someone to validate your existing decisions
• Therapy for deep personal issues
• A replacement for doing your own thinking
• Magic that works without effort

Red Flags

• Coaches who talk more than they listen
• Anyone who promises specific outcomes
• Excessive reliance on assessments or frameworks
• Coaches who seem to be projecting their experience onto you
• Anyone who makes you feel dependent on them

Cost and ROI

Coaching rates vary widely:

| Type | Typical Range | |------|---------------| | Life coach | $100-300/hour | | Career coach | $200-500/hour | | Executive coach | $500-1500/hour | | Elite executive coach | $1500-3000+/hour |

• A salary negotiation that gets you $20k more: pays for a year of coaching
• A bad career decision you avoid: priceless
• Getting promoted 6 months faster: easily ROI positive

The question isn't whether coaching is expensive. It's whether the cost of not having it is higher.

What You'll Walk Away With

When you engage a coach properly, you get:

• Clarity on what you actually want
• A thinking partner for difficult decisions
• Honest feedback you're not getting elsewhere
• Accountability for making progress
• Skills that last beyond the engagement

The goal isn't to need a coach forever. It's to develop the capacity to coach yourself—and to know when you need outside help again.